Take time to Realize

I think I took this year for granted. Or rather...the amount of time I had spent with them this year. I don't think I savored it. I think it just passed by with my thinking it'd always be there. That they'd always be there. But now, I guess its time to make these last 8 days count for the next time we'll see each other. 

And it took me a while to realize what I was looking for was right in front of my nose. Hmm..and I'm glad I did what I did. If not, I think I would have been pretty miserable. 

I've been so busy,

and too lazy to write. But I've got to say. Today was pretty good, despite the fact that theres a rollercoaster down there somewhere in my heart and a sense of peace somewhere in the same region. 

Being in that room and holding up "The Golden Ass" book, talking to Mr.JH, and signing our initials made me want to freeze that moment and sit in it for a while. Today just seemed perfect, even though, to an outsider, it wouldn't seem like it. I got the guts to do something I've never done before. Which makes me realize no matter what happens, you've got those special people in your heart to back you up. 

Now, it's just a decision between whether to follow my brain over my heart, or my heart over my brain. Damn. 

"Y for me,

M for you."

This

is the worst day of my life.

Worth it.

I've been deprived of sleep since Saturday night. And I've been waking up later than usual due to the lack of sleep. But I'd say, it's all worth it. This week has gone by excruciatingly slow, but it's Friday tomorrow, and I definitely can't wait until Saturday. Then, after Saturday, I can't wait till Thursday. What a month. 

Walls

Hmm...I feel like there's a wall between us. There was none before. And now, there's a small wall between our friendship. That's all I'm going to say, even though, in reality, I just want to scream in the grand canyon and give you a reality check.  

Owls and Early Birds

I stayed up until 4 or 5 talking to Kaylee and Don on the phone and on aim. & the only reason I had to leave the conversation was because my mom came home (long story, don't ask). It makes me: A.) glad that I have friends like that and B.) sad I don't have friends like that at my school. I don't know. I love my school, but I miss being around everyone I've known since kindergarten. I miss being around people I can pour my heart out to, and not get judged no matter what I do or say. And most of all, still be loved no matter what I've done, thought, or said. I miss having people there whose opinions of me never change.



My school and my supposed-to-be high school are as different as owls and early birds. But staying up 10-4 makes me wonder if everything is kind of the same. Even though, I know there's a big difference between the moon and the sun.

I

hate this. So, SO much. I wish I was there, again. I miss it. Actually, I miss having friends that care.

Friends

are the greatest. My two best don't go to my school. So what happens when I feel like I need a shoulder to cry on? I know they'll always be there for me because we understand each other. I can pour my heart out and they'll tell me what they think, everything. It's amazing. I miss not seeing them everyday. But I'm thankful everyday that they're my best friends. We'll never betray one another, or backstab. Yeah, we've been through THAT much<3